Monday, October 8, 2007


Mary T. called about 45 minutes ago -- we have a court date for this Friday, October 12th!!!!
Whew.......I'm taking a deeeeeeeeeeep breath.

Because our situation is unique, I am still holding my breath until we get through courts again and have an official adoption contract!!!!

Truthfully, I'm afraid to re-engage in making plans, repacking, etc. again until I know for sure that we made it through courts successfully. I just can not afford another emotional roller coaster ride. As it is, I've been on the verge of crying twice this week. I should just let myself go and cry my eyes outs, but I won't. Gotta be the grown-up. These past few months have been sooooo difficult trying to discern why this happened, knowing that no matter what the answer is, it will never totally satisfy my need to hold her in my arms now, and to mourn the loss of the two + months we lost with her. Maybe it's selfish, I don't know. I wear my emotions on my sleeve, but try to pretend they are not there. But they are real, and my heart aches, just aches to be her mommy.


The Breedlove family said...

I am so excited for you! I screamed out loud "Oh, yea!" and my daughter said, "What are you yeaing about, mom?" I can't believe you will have your little one in your arms before the end of the month! WOW! Finally! Amy

Eileen and Jerry Mestas said...

YAY!!! Us too!!!! Hopefully we will be traveling at the same time!

The Quinn Girls said...

Congratulations. My thoughts will be with you until you get the final word. Can't wait to see pics of you hloding your little one.

LISA said...

Hi, just found your blog. Nice to see another "older" couple adopting! I have 2 grown children, my husband of 3 years has never had children.I've always wanted to adopt children,so this is wonderful! Hopefully we will be parents together soon!

Eileen and Jerry Mestas said...

Congratulations!!! This is amazing isn't it? We are working w/Susan Parr travel to get our arrangements. We are probably leaving 10/26 and returning 11/2. So it looks like we will definately be there together.. Can't wait to meet you.. God Bless and keep in touch. We will be praying for you too!

Laura said...

Hey there,
I just came across your blog on the Mestas' blog. Praying that all goes well and you'll be holding sweet pickles very soon. :)